Sometimes breakups are a good thing, and sometimes they are heart-rending. Either way, there will come a time when you need to move on and start getting ready to put yourself back out there. We have established five important steps that you should take during this bounce-back time. Use these tips to get yourself ready for love once again!
Tell the story of your breakup; that might help to facilitate healing
Sometimes, you have to let out the pain and tell the story of your breakup to a sympathetic ear. You have a few avenues available to you when you are trying to tell the story. First off, you might think about talking to a friend that will listen and not say anything until you want to hear them. Just getting the story off your chest is important; you don’t necessarily need to get advice about how you should have done anything better. Another great option that too few people take about their former relationships is talking to a therapist. You might get some insight or closure from talking to a professional about the events leading up to the breakup. The advice these pros can provide will help you heal quicker than if you were on your own.
Try again, find your love when you’re ready
Although it might feel too soon, you should never close yourself off from finding love entirely. To that end, it is wise to use a method of dating that you can ease into, swim around in the shallow end, and get comfortable. Using a casual dating site is just the thing to help you in this endeavor. Dating sites let you take control over your romance by allowing you to message people when you want, accept chat requests, or try to start something serious. You get to set the tempo of the romances, and you get to determine what you want. You never have to give in to pressure or worry about getting caught in an awkward position by being asked out by someone too soon after a breakup.
Do what you’ve ever wanted to try
You do not have to rush back into a relationship at all. Some people get involved with someone at a young age and never have a chance to go off on their own and experience life. Now that you have a break from being in a relationship, it’s time to discover yourself and figure out what you want from life. A great way to make that happen is by trying everything you’ve ever wanted. Some people want to travel the world, sow their oats, and meet new people before they come back and settle down. Others want to spend time getting fit, changing jobs, or partaking in something they never could in the confines of a relationship. No matter what you want to do, the best time to make it happen is when you’re single.
Attempt not to see ending the relationship as a failure
You have to contextualize your last relationship before you can move on and get involved with a new one. Part of that process is recognizing what your relationship was and seeing what you gained from it. Now, some people think that you don’t gain anything from a relationship that fell apart. The truth is that you might have learned more about yourself and the way you behave in a relationship than you ever could while single. Maybe you and your ex babysat her nephew too often, and now you realize that kids aren’t for you. Perhaps you have discovered that you need to be in a relationship that has a higher degree of intimacy. Whatever you learned from the partnership coming apart, you can apply those lessons to your future connections and make sure you get what you desire in the future. You live, and you learn; that is the best way to find out what you truly want and need from life and partnerships.
Have fun with your friends
Last but not least, you need to hang out with your friends. The vast majority of people spend less time with their friends if they are in a relationship. Now is the time to fall back on the guys or gals and make up for the lost time. Cut loose, go wild, plan a trip, or just hang out for the first time all year. Get back into their good graces, get their input on your life, and dispense some wisdom of your own. You need to build up a support structure for all the steps that come next, whether that is going back into relationships or doing something new with your life for a while.
When relationships fall apart, it might feel like the end of the world. You should look for the silver lining in the clouds and start to pursue new avenues that help you evolve as a person. Get the romances you desire, try new things, or just spend more time enjoying yourself— the choice is yours!