Guest Bloggers

Ditch the Duds: Types Of People To Avoid If You Are Looking For Real Love


Guest Blogger:  Shannon Kaiser |

Dating and finding new love can be filled with expectations, excitement and hope. If you are like me, you may place all of your future hopes and dreams into one little package often known as the first date. You may be picking up the broken pieces of your relationships past, you glue yourselves back together, dust yourselves off and jump in with both feet, yet again, overflowing with hope. But what happens when your wished-for Mr. Right turns into a horrible night?

The reality is, the journey to finding lasting love is paved with a lot of evenings drenched in awkward exchanges, unfulfilled expectations, and sloppy kisses. Let's face it gals, these are the stories that make up the single person's love life. After suffering through years of bad dates, I consciously chose to stop the madness! On a mission to attract high-quality romantic love, I took a year off from romantic dating. This self-experiment has given me tremendous clarity into what I really need from a partner, and, more importantly, what I don't need or want.


Luckily for me, my year of celibacy has given me a new perspective on dating and what to never settle for again. Are you asking yourself if your new squeeze is “the one.” Or maybe you're single and wondering when you will find your perfect partner. In your passion-filled quest to find lasting love, avoid these types of people. They hardly ever turn into real love, and they are the type of people who will weigh you down.

Ditch the Duds: Types Of People To Avoid If You Are Looking For Real Love

Mr. Emotional Vampire

Emotional vampires feed off helpful and kind people. They want you to feel bad for them so they can keep the attention on themselves.

After you leave a date, ask yourself how do you feel? Do you feel exhausted, numb or even empty? Whether the emotional vampire in your life is a friend, family member or a romantic interest, it is best to leave them to their own darkness. Just send them love and light and carry on.

Mr. Emotionally Unavailable

If you give more than you receive, if your partners don’t show up for you, if they're poor communicators (Mr. I am going to "text" you, but can't bother to ever call.), or if they're full of excuses and indecisiveness, they won't be your happily ever after. You can't save them, or make them see how great you are. When they give you mixed signals, it's a sign they're not willing or ready to commit. It's best if you move along to someone who can see your awesome self.

Mr.“I'm Not Over My Ex”

You may be dating a closet "I'm not over my ex" person. They may tell you they are completely free of burdens from their past, that there's no drama, and that things ended amicably. But watch out love warriors. When the name of their ex comes up how do they act? Does their body language change? Do they become tense, or even worse; do they become angry and shout horrible things about that person?

It's best to break it off with this type of person and allow them to heal their emotional wounds. Also, take the opportunity to look at your own history and see if you're carrying any resentment toward past lovers so you can avoid this trap in your future relationships

Mr. Victim

"It is not my fault,” or “How could this happen to me?" Sound familiar? For the vitim, life sucks and it will keep sucking even more. They feed off of your high energy. Bad things will keep happening and nothing is ever their fault. EVER.

Run away. This person is no good for you. You deserve to be with someone who is accountable, and someone who can take responsibility for his actions.

Your future self will thank you.